disconnect me

♣

2008/12/31 || 10:03 am

Henry Mancini.

I love this guy's songs.

Moon River.

You make me feel like dancing.

Pink Panther Theme

Rhapsody in Blue

just to name a few of my favourites..

Moon River,

always makes me really sad.

I've listened to this song since I was really young,

but the only time it really struck a chord in me,

was that one time..

It was played..

His favourite song.

Mrs Magdalene Low's husband.

She was my English Literature teacher,

and she was a really wonderful teacher.

I was fearful of her,

but I always knew she was a great teacher.

The number of IJ girls who came to her husband's wake..

and those who attended the St Joseph's Church ceremony..

It was staggering.

I remember,

we were all trying really hard not to cry..

but when the youngest son broke down

(his father passed away on his birthday,

also the day that he won 3rd place in sailing)

the second son was comforting him,

and ended up crying as well...

When the oldest son was comforting them both,

he cried,

and Mrs Low cried then.

It was a really heart wrenching sight.

It can never be described,

that kind of sorrow,

of losing a love one.

At St Joseph's church,

when the late Mr Low's favourite song,

Moon River,

was played,

I cried.

So did many around me.

Actually,

almost everyone was crying by then.

It was when the coffin was carried out.

Sigh.

I'm bad with farewells.

I hope I never have to face that day.

Ever.

I can't wait for school to start,

to distract me.

Anything for a distraction.

Yet,

I know I'm not ready for this.

I'm still scared.

I'm still..

unprepared.

I thought I have mentally prepared myself forever,

but it seems that,

forever is not long enough.

I wish I will have Indora with me.

Still patiently waiting for RuiAnn's call.

♣

|| 4:15 am

忍耐.

我必须忍耐。

烦。

但我会忍耐。

I'm irritated,

I'm blaming it on PMS,

but we've been fighting a lot.

Did you realise?

We live in the same damn room.

Okay?

I know I have a lot of stuff,

but I can't pack them,

because my bags and boxes are all full.

Did you realise that?

You are always asking me to do this and that.

I try not to grumble,

but I'm lazy.

It's in the genes.

Why else are you like that too?

However,

when I do grumble,

I'm being bad..

I'm being.. "naughty"

I'm not a good sister.

Go sod yourself.

Okay?

You never tune the guitar.

When I do it,

you play,

and then I have to retune it.

When you do tune the guitar,

guess what?

It all goes off.

That means double the job for me.

I'm cross.

Yes I am.

I know you have helped me a lot,

but hey.

I am petty,

remember?

You all drum it in me since I was young anyway,

so since you are so sure that I am petty,

since such a tender age,

GET USED TO IT.

You said..

I get angry at the simplest of things.

I get angry just when you say a little,

is that true?

Can I tell you something?

This is not throwing a tantrum.

You,

obviously have forgotten how I used to throw my temper around.

I am just shutting up,

because I don't want to argue and quarrel anymore.

Yes.

I shut up,

with a black face.

By shutting up,

I think I'm doing us all a huge favour already.

Alright?

I hate arguing,

because when I am angry,

I want to scream.

I want to cry.

I cry,

out of anger.

Not just when I am sad.

That means I cry a lot.

Great.

Now that is making me a cry baby to you,

right?

Fine.

Whatever.

I've always been the spoilt crybaby,

with the bad temper and all.

Fine.

When I asked nicely,

you answered me so horridly.

I don't care now,

if your fucking shit is lost.

Okay?

I know it cost a lot,

and I know I promised to help you find it when I'm sorting out my things,

but guess what?

WHATEVER.

okay?

If you treat me like dirt,

I'll treat you like dirt too.

FUCK.

I'm so pissed off.

Sigh.

On a lighter note,

I finished

"the patient" by Michael Palmer.

It's seriously a good book.

I'll give it a 4.75/5,

simply because I don't believe in full marks for language/writing.

"Trunk Music" by Michael Connelly is not bad either.

a 4/5.

All his detective books with the main character "Bosch",

are interesting.

I'm halfway through "Double Cross" by James Patterson.

It's not bad really,

but next to the other two,

it wanes in comparison.

"Alex Cross" the main character,

is getting a little old,

so the book is.. slower in pace.

Not my type.

Haha.

but I still remember,

James Patterson's "cat & mouse"

and "the lake house"

are beautifully written.

Highly recommended!

If you need a no-brainer kind of book,

do read the "shopaholic" series.

Good for destressing.

"Can you keep a secret?" by Meg Cabot is also one of my favourites.

"the Undomestic Goddess" is funny too.

Sigh.

Movies that I have watched are..

Bolt.

Yeap.

That's all.

Somehow,

mummy and I have been trying to watch "Mamma Mia"

but there is always a problem or another.

I don't know why.

I like that movie.

Bolt is nice.

I love that dog.

I have "Madagascar 2" and "Harry Potter & the order of Phoenix",

which I want to watch.

Yeap,

for a Potter Maniac (Ex),

I haven't even watched the show..

A little late,

right?

And for the first time in my life,

I watched a Hong Kong drama series.

家好月圆

TVB thingy.

Apparently it received some award too.

I like it.

It's long,

draggy and..

forever,

but I like it.

My sister borrowed it from someone,

and it's been years since all three of us sat down and watched something together.

Even my brother was there!

I know! the shock, right?

and..

everytime the stupid mooncake advertisement came out,

we'll be so...

upset.

Wanting to watch the show.

and sometimes,

the subtitles (chinese)

doesn't come out,

and I'll panic like crap!

because by the time they are at the end of the conversation,

I have barely figured out the start of it!

but I think 阿红,

shouldn't have become "good".

She should have just gone crazy,

lose her sanity and all because her plans are spoilt.

I don't like a complete Happy Ending,

but I don't want a sad one,

or a half-hanging one either.

I'm picky.

and I watched 蜡笔小新,

japanese version.

A..

movie.

Some japanese war thing.

My sister wanted me to watch it for a long time.

I'm glad I did.

It's nice.

Okay,

I'm less angry.

Ranting helps.

Thank God for blogs.

Oh,

and I like the game "diner dash".

It's kind of like the first of this kind that I played.

Now there's..

"Doggie dash"

some..

"fastfood dash" thing..

and "cake mania"

which are.. similar.

but I still love "diner dash!"

and mario on PSP is absolutely LOVELY!

I remember Grace helping me get the memory stick..

SanDisk 4GB for about.. SGD52.

Apparently,

it's kind of cheap.

Thank goodness for PC fairs and friends who go!

Thanks Grace!

Mr Leong,

(owner of a shop called Game King)

modified my PSP,

and gave me a USB cable,

for free!

Thank goodness I never brought it to Far East to do it!

Hahaha.

Plus,

he installed mario for me.

Now,

the only thing left is..

for me to figure out..

how to download games into my PSP by myself..

Okay,

I'm feeling a lot happier.

Hehehe.

I know I should stop getting angry,

but I can't help it.

Phew.

At least I've never gotten angrier at anyone than my..

*ehem*

dearest EX.

Hahaha.

Okay,

I think I may be losing my bearings a little.

Now my dad can't find the iPhone pouch that I brought back with mummy from Kuching for him,

because he left it behind,

and it's on my head too.

So first,

that stupid Goddamn pouch,

plus my sister's stupid idiotic iPod car player.

This is so irritating.

Why the hell do I have to look for things you all lost?

As if I don't have enough things that I lost.

Okay,

you know what..

cuz I was interrupted from blogging halfway,

my "therapy" is not working anymore.

I realised,

my blog,

is an important outlet to me.

so sod it.

I'm pissed off.

I can't wait for RuiAnn's call.

♣

2008/12/30 || 12:40 pm

Okay.

I'm a cranky b*tch,
and I had so much coconut juice,
I think I'll get my period earlier.

What Makes A Malaysian A Malaysian

1. You can name all the players from the the English Premier League, but ask you to name one football player from Malaysia , one name also cannot come out.

2. When StreamyX come, you complain StreamyX too slow. When Maxis Broadband come, you complain Maxis Broadband always disconnects. When WiMax come, you complain Wimax too expensive. In the end, you say StreamyX still the best lah.

3. When toll price increase, you complain. When petrol price increase, you complain. When you go Starbucks buy RM10 coffee, NO COMPLAINTS.

4. When you cannot find parking in a shopping mall and have to walk very far, you complain. When you go inside the shopping mall and there's SALE, run from one end of 1Utama to the other also NO COMPLAINTS.

5. You are always late. And the excuse you give when you're late is always either: (a) traffic jam (b) no transport or (c) cannot find parking.

6. You have a parent who force you to take science stream in high school, study engineering in Uni, then when you graduate, they ask you to forget everything you learnt in Uni and do commerce.

7. You know someone who can specially develop an angmoh accent when speaking to a American / British / Australian.

8. You complain against the government in kopitiam, you talk loud loud. Leave anonymous comments on blogs, you also talk loud loud. Attend ceremah by DAP, you shout loud loud. Then when Opposition organise a protest and ask you to go, you dun wan. Scared later kena tangkap by ISA.

9. Every year on the 30th April, you are one of the people below queueing up last minute to submit your tax return at the IRB.

10. When you pay RM10 for something that costs RM1, you blame the Chinese.

11. When a government service is too slow, you blame the Malays.

12. When a building is not good and collapsed, you blame the Indians.

13. When a Chinese student won a scholarship, you say 'Wah! Very clever hor?'

14. When a Malay student won a scholarship, you say 'Aiya! Of course lah! He Malay mah!'

15. When an angmoh stranger kiss you on the cheek to say hello, you very happy. When a Malaysian guy kiss you on the cheek to say hello, you slap him.

I know I'm Malaysian,

I fit like...

all 15 points?

Hahaha.

I'm not going to promise not to go,

but I'll try,

because it's hurting me.

It's not like last time,

last time it was like that,

I always got angry,

now it's different.

I'm doing this for my sanity.

I'll jiayou!

Rewatching The Sound of Music,

it's nice!

It's making me feel warm and nice!

I think facebook is boring when no one writes on your wall.

Haha.

I'm cutting myself out,

cutting myself away..

Maybe I don't even need to do it for real..

It will just fall into place nicely.

I'm non-existent anyway.

Sigh.

I hate PMS-ing.

♣

2008/12/29 || 2:05 pm

I hate ironing.
It's a fact that I have just discovered today,
after about 2 hours of ironing.

I have really discovered,
the luxury of having a maid.

Then,
I wouldn't have to fold the clothes,
I wouldn't need to pick up the dog shit.
I wouldn't need to sweep the floor,
or mop it afterwards.
The toilet will always be clean and hair-free.
I wouldn't need to sweep the porch.
There's no need to IRON.
There's no need to wipe the windows,
or wash the car.
There's no need to take the trash out,
or wash the dishes,
clean the table,
set the table before meals.
Sigh.
I know I must be patient.
The maid will come..
And we'll not be at home,
so there's less havoc.
Have I mentioned that the laundry needs to be hung dry outside?
Then kept..
Then folded..
and all that nonsense.
I realised,
maybe apart from cooking,
because it's fun,

I don't like housework.
Full Stop.

On a slightly happier note,
I got my PSP modified today.
=D
Although I have not finished playing "Need for Speed",
I have more games now!
Mario,
Pokemon,
all these games are like..
just there!
=D
And I managed to play
"God of War"
in medium standard!
Not bad!
=D
I'm better at violent,
killing games,
than stupid races.
=P

To Chin Yen,
Chien Wen,
Rui Ann,
Matt,
Thanks for tagging.
=)

I miss Yee Won,
and I wonder when I'll see her..
When I'll see RuiAnn..
When I'll see Gracia,
Zack,
Jix again..

Mentioning Gracia upsets me.
Sigh.
We met once,
in my entire 2 week stay in Kuching.
I won't lie about how I feel.
The only reason why I went so long,
was because there was an invitation to her house.
I couldn't get through to her forever,
then the night after the air tickets were booked,
I managed to get her.
and she was having a lot of problems.
So the staying over plan,
was cancelled.
And I was stuck in that PLACE.
I met her once,
stayed over at her place,
with Amy.
=)
Left the next day in a hurry.
Evacuation programme.
Sigh.
Met her one other time at night,
and finally met her mother.
She called when I was up in the rainforest,
and we were supposed to meet once more,
on the day before I was leaving,
before that day,
I texted,
on that day,
I texted,
on the day I was leaving,
yeap,
you guessed it.
I texted.
No replies until today.
Needless to say,
this,
has been the worst kuching trip I've had.
It was too long,
I had to deal with my aunty,
and that spoilt brat,
and there was no internet,
and I feel..
Sigh.
Gracia,
I feel betrayed.
you know,
I know it's all like..
coincidental and all..
Bad luck,
or whatever,
but..
I'm glad that..
when you offered,
I'm the only one who took up the offer.
What would have happened if people like..
Matt, KC, Zac, Jix, SK, Vid, Zippy came?
Stay in a hotel and rot?
I know I'm being mean,
but today,
I don't care if I sound like a bitch,
I'll be truthful.
I'll face the music later.
I just want to say what I want to say.

I haven't been to church for ages.
I can't even really remember the serene feeling.
There was a stupid argument between mum, I and sister, dad.
about religion.
I hate STUPID talks on religion.
If you don't believe,
I don't believe in forcing you to believe,
but just shut your trap and stop asking me why I believe.
I just do,
okay?

Oh yes,
Matt,
I got the emails.

Speaking of which,
I have so many emails in my hotmail,
I can't be bothered to open them.
Not with this stupid internet which is so slow.

Mei..
I have been waiting foryou for like.. an hour..
I have no idea why you are not on yet..

My back feels like its breaking..
or near breaking.
I just read about an article,
that women are prone to having low blood pressure.
I match a few symptoms,
maybe I got it from my mum.
It explains why my feet always gets numb from sitting(especially on the floor) during assemblies.
I've also been having a lot of blackouts.
When I stand up from squatting,
when I stand up from sitting,
when I stand up from kneeling,
when I suddenly turn..
Maybe I'm getting old.
After all,
my brother pulled 7 white hairs from my head,
then my mum pulled another 2 in like.. a few day's after.

Actually,
it's suddenly obvious to me,
that I am having PMS.
I'm about to have my STUPID period in like..a few day's..
supposedly the 1st..
so I'm entitled to have my PMS.

After reaching home last night,
o.. this morning at 130am,
(the stupid AirAsia was DELAYED by ONE STUPID HOUR)
(plus dad took a wrong turn,
this and that,
so mummy and I had to wait)
I was tired.
I woke up at 9am yesterday,
and didn't nap or slept a wink at all.
The plane lights were so glaring..
and it was the first flight I didn't sleep in like.. YEARS.
Honest.

Okay.
I'm pissed off.
and my family isn't making things easier.

"you're so difficult"
"you don't understand me"
"I hate you"
"I hate golf"
Yeah yeah yeah.
I get that you are upset and all,
but stop threatening.
Okay,
I know you don't mean it either,
but I just want to say this on my territory,
if you really want to divorce,
we can't stop you.
We're old enough,
to handle this kinda shit.
I didn't think it'll ever happen,
or that we will even talk about it.
I'm 18,
so there's no need for any child custody or whatever,
you only need mutual agreement.
You don't even really need to tell us kids.
Happy?
Just do what you want.
If it really makes you happy,
just do it.
Okay?
I feel like shit that this is happening,
that Hansel doesn't like to talk to Gretel or me,
that you said he hates us,
that he always gets his way,
one way or another,
I only noticed the slight favoritism,
when it was mentioned to me.
I was blinded.
I looked at our family through rose-tinted glasses.
I wanted our family to be perfect,
so I thought of it that way.
Sometimes,
my imagination takes me on a ride,
on a ride so great,
that I forget reality.
Since now reality is right in my stupid face,
what can I say?
All I want for Christmas is a warm, loving family?
It's more likely I'll get my two perfect front teeth.
and guess what?
Christmas is OVER.
Fine.
Biatch.
I hate this.

I miss RuiAnn....
=(

I remember when I wanted to move..
because everyone I went with,
had moved away..
Moved out,
and moved there.
I wanted to go along,
but the first attempt..
I couldn't wake up..
I never tried again.
I was too scared.
Too scared someone would realise..
Scared that someone would comment..
Scared that someone would just jokingly tease,
and hit the jackpot.
I never asked.
Gracia knew..
I was scared to return too!
I was scared of being alone..
oh well.
It was since then..
That I've never gone.

My parents have started letting our relatives and friends know..
I'm mostly fine with it,
but tonight,
alone in the room,
I suddenly feel that..
"I DON'T WANT ANY PITY FROM ANYONE"
I hate this.
I suddenly feel that..
all those times..
everyone was just pitying me..
that's why they accompanied me..

and to Mr-You-Know-Who-You-Are,
don't make promises you can't keep.
People still read your blog(I consider myself human)
Stop playing around with me.
I don't give a shit about you,
but if you want to play games,
don't come crying when I've burnt you out.

Okay
I'm being bitchy,
and angry,
and stupid.

You know,
no matter how I try to be thankful,
and forgiving,
and what not..
I can't get over it.
Our friendship has changed the day you told me the truth,
and I you.
I would rather not know.
You are a better person than me,
I've always believed in that.
I still do.
but my confidence has been shattered,
I'm still shocked,
my judgement has never been so far off..
I hate you for that.
because I hate myself for that.
I hate this.
Maybe in years,
I'll look back and laugh about it,
but right now,
I'm still hurting about it.
Less...
yes.
A lot less..
but everytime I PMS..
I think of this.
It just comes naturally.
That's why I can't really talk to you properly.
Everytime I talk to you,
you talk about C,
and I think of that.
When I talk to C,
I don't feel that way,
maybe because C doesn't always talk about you,
maybe because we talk about other stuff,
and C listens to me a lot.
I hate how I don't talk to C,
but C knows everything you and I talk about.
It becomes boring.
I never get to tell C anything.
You two EMAIL and talk like..
daily anyway.
I think I'm on the verge of breaking down.
I was fine..
but I was like this.. just before I left.
and I was fighting so hard to control it..
Fighting not to lash out,
fighting not to cry..
I've not cried.
Not really anyway,
but I feel betrayed.
and I don't care.
I don't care anymore.
Maybe I'm just that kind of girl that you should not get too close to.
I don't give a shit about what you think,
but I really miss RuiAnn right now.

MEI!!!!!
=(
I get you...
Sigh.
All men should just jump off the cliff.
Maybe mummy will be happier too...
and I'll be rid of HANSEL.
Hmph.

♣ A Few Days Ago...

2008/12/26 || 2:01 pm

I've to admit,
it's hard to resist the lure of the internet.
It's inconvenient,
but I really love blogging too much to pass it up.

Chatting on MSN with my iTouch,
but blogging on the Mac.
Wi-fi,
is an ingenious creation by Man.

Anyway,
I think she's too selfish,
but that makes me reevaluate myself.
Who am I to comment?
Who am I to judge?
Aren't I just as bad?
But she's SIX.
And she's my cousin.
Believe it or not,
I still think I am only so upset,
because I want the best for her.
She's six,
and she's a snake.
Bleah.
Okay,
I think I'm a b*tch and I should stop,
but I am so disappointed in her.
Sigh.
I shall blog about this another time.

Internet time is too precious.

Going to Damai tomorrow.
I was supposed to meet Cia for lunch today,
her mother invited me along,
for some lunch date
with her accountant/lawyer cousin/uncle/friend,
but my mummy said no,
so I could not go,
and I had to pass up "twilight" too.
Bleah.

I'm a little upset though.
Sigh.
Oh yes,
Matt!!!
Thanks for talking to me yesterday.
I don't know if you knew,
but you made me feel a lot better bout things,
and sometimes,
it feels that I'm still there in OH,
sitting on the swing next to you,
and nothing has really changed.
=)

I was with my daddy today,
and my grandma was commenting on how I was always,
and will always be,
"daddy's girl".
However,
I noticed I've been really rude to him..
He's stressed,
about money matters,
and I've been rude,
and so bad..
I don't know if he feels it,
but I think he does..
because everytime after I snap at him,
or frown and reply,
he seems to look so.. shocked.
and a little wistful.
I feel bad.
I do.
I hate my temper sometimes.
I need to go for some anger management course..
So here goes,

to my dearest daddy,
first of all,
I owe you big time,
for bringing me into this world.
Maybe you regret it sometimes,
when I'm naughty,
when I make you angry,
when I make mummy cry and she takes it out on you,
when I take things out on you..
but I hope that's not too often..
that you know.
I never meant to hurt you.
I say things I don't mean out of anger.
I lash out,
and sound angry,
when I am not really that angry..
I don't know how to tell this to you,
because I know you may find it a little...
well,
maybe very "geli".
I love you a lot daddy.
It's true.
Maybe I don't always support your going for golf,
but that's because I know that mummy will be really upset if I encourage you to go.
She's lonely.
She feels overworked and that you are not there.
I know you need a break too,
but I also know,
this nagging from her,
is routine,
it's almost like..
drinking water.
So..
Daddy,
actually I don't hate golf.
Ever since Mr Andrew took Grace and I to there for a few putts,
I actually don't mind following you around..
but I would much rather pick up archering and horse back riding.
Haha.
I won't lie to you about that.
=P
Daddy,
maybe I'm getting a little old,
because sometimes when I hold your hand,
you brush mine away in like...
5 seconds..
Have I irritated you?
Are you stressed?
I dare not ask,
for it may not be a big deal to you,
maybe you are just tired and all..
and I don't want to kick a fuss about it.
I just miss holding your hand..
knowing you are always there for me..
Feeling safe always..
Daddy,
I miss you,
even when I'm right next to you.
I miss how you used to peel each and every peanut for me.
I miss how you used to feed my mango slices,
and I miss how you always seem so cute.
=)
I miss you.
I'll miss you when I'm in KL.
You know,
no one can ever replace you in my heart.
Mummy always told us,
you were the one to change our nappies.
You were the one to feed us at 2am so she could sleep.
You were always giving us the best,
buying us branded goods,
when you salvaged for the cheapest shirts and pants that looked alright.
You drove me all the way down to Singapore.
You were so worried about me when I first went.
In 3 years,
you never failed to tell mummy
"eh... 9 o'clock... shouldn't we call her?"
=)
It's sweet.
You know?
It's really sweet.
You were always there.
You are still always here.
trips overseas when you have work..
Work that you are married to,
to support us 3..
Trips to NZ, USA, UK,
Australia, Japan,
Taiwan, HK,
China, Singapore
that you spent so much..
just so we could see the world..
I know you want a lawyer in the family..
and they tried,
but they can't..
So I will give it a shot.
I don't want to disappoint you,
so I will do my best.
=)
I'm proud of my daddy,
and I want my daddy to be proud of me.
I am scared.
I see your graying hair..
I know that..
Some things are unavoidable,
some things cannot be prevented,
but I don't want things to happen.
I want to give you and mummy a good living.
Let you two lead a comfortable retirement.
I'll try not to be demanding now.
I'll try to save.
I'll try to be good.
I promise to always try.
Daddy,
no matter what,
I love you.
Please remember that always.
*hugs*

♣

|| 5:07 am

Internet's not too stable because I'm still not home,
still using my sister's MACbook and her X1 and celcom internet.
Hehehe...

I blogged the other day,
but internet was disconnected.
so I'll update later.

but most importantly,

HAPPY BIRTHDAY GRETEL NG KHER TSE!

I owe you gazillion of pictures here.
=P

I love my sister.

Yes,
Happy birthday to Aunty Jean Khoo too!
and erm..
Happy Boxing day to the rest of us!
=D

♣

2008/12/23 || 1:27 pm

♣

2008/12/22 || 10:44 am

I've INTERNET!!!!

thanks to my dearest sister's Macbook Pro,
and her (actually really stupid) celcom,
and the iPod wireless adapter crap thing.
=P
Why is celcom stupid?
That deserves a really long post.

I saw lot of tags people,
but I have to reply later,
because I have a super short time on the laptop,
bro's waiting in turn!

Time in Kuching has been...
Well,
there has been ups and downs.
A lot of drama.
Lol.
I'm just glad I can online now.
but well,
I still have to go off.
I want to go on msn!!!!
=(((
Sigh.

I need to have a super long post!!!
Sorry Sultan that it's so time consuming.
Lol.
=P
I'm dying to blog,
like really blog,
talk to MeiMei!
Matt!
NYON YEE WON!!!!
Lol.
I forgive you.
but I demand that we talk online when I'm home!
=P
I miss all of you people.
=P

Life's been crazy,
but I'm going to some rainforest resort at Damai on 24th.
Back to nature sort of thing.
Bleah.
I can't belive time's flying by.
It's Christmas soon!

I know they say this the season to be jolly (song!)
but..
it's been a pretty freaked up year,
and ...
Well,
I'm just thankful we're back,
One family.

Yes,
we fight damn lot,
like every other minute,
but I still believe,
together we stand.
Together we can.
=)

Merry Christmas in advance everyone.
May this season remind of you of everything good that has happened,
and bring much happiness and joy to you.
May the good Lord smile His blessing to you,
and your dearest loved ones,
because it is for Him that we celebrate this blessed day.

=)

♣ iTouch

2008/12/14 || 3:17 am

whee!! I didn't know that there's wi-fi in lttc, klia. So I can still online today. Pointless, but oh well.. LOL.. I love my iTouch. Hehe

♣

2008/12/13 || 1:40 pm

Okay,

only Mei updated her blog.

I'm bored.

So here are some random shots from before.

My daddy took this.

I've definitely have had better shots,

but I like this,

because my daddy took it.

Hehehe.

Yup,

I'm still so LOYAL to NY.

Lol.

The truth?

I am out of clothes to wear.

Everything is in a pile in luggages and I am so sick of looking at that mess.

Mummy in the background next to the car.

She's so small you can only peek at her head.

This picture,

hehe.

I took with my daddy.

Guess what was he saying?

"Wait."

Lol.

Well,

too late.

It is not a good shot either,

but oh well.

I like this too.

This was a few days later,

mummy resting in the background.

and here is my...

overweight sister.

I love her.

I think she looks like a little boy here.

Cute.

Well,

I think so anyway.

and here is a picture I took today.

KC,

remember you needed something important for celebration of culture?

(I just typed it as Culture of celebration! Lol..it's ironic. really)

for the 汤圆

and you..

took it from the gardener?

Well,

check this out.

If you can tell from the parquet flooring,

this pandan plant,

(to me)

it is huge.

Hahaha.

Apparently,

in my house?

We have it EVERYWHERE.

Inside,

outside,

upstairs,

downstairs.

My mum says it keeps away cockroaches,

and that it reall works.

Since she has said so,

Alright.

Hehe.

I really am too bored.

Blogging about nonsense as such.

But anyway,

I had my second attempt on the motorbike yesterday evening.

It was truly embarrassing.

There was a man,

who was on a motorbike who kept looking.

He happens to be this primary school teacher,

who never taught us,

but has a...

reputation.

Yes.

Well,

I could not control the bike properly.

It is fine,

when I am just going,

but when I have to "release"

and increase the gear,

I tend to lean to the left

(because the gear is on the left side of the bike, near the foot rest)

and then the bike will go out of control.

I personally think that it isn't helpful that someone is sitting behind.

It makes you lose control,

lose balance.

But,

maybe that's just my excuse.

Hahaha.

I went into the grassy area,

but I have made some improvements.

Seriously.

I no longer brake using my feet.

I use the two brakes there.

heheh.

So I did not hit the tree,

but my sister went..

"That's all for today!!!! Oh my god.."

hahahhaa.

It was..

well,

embarrassing,

but I'm still happy I had a second go at it.

And Tiwi,

you are most welcome.

*hugs*

I miss you a lot.

I don't want to be away from the internet!!!

ARGH!

Bleah,

and Aylwin still isn't online.

I was hoping to talk to him or something.

Bleah.

Tom & Jerry is cute!

hehe.

♣

|| 4:21 am

Did I forget to blog last night?

I'm a tad surprised.

Lol..

but oh well,

I'm not going to be blogging for..

2 weeks I presume,

since there is no internet over in the Kuching house

*Wails*

If I am lucky,

I'll be meeting Gracia,

Zhi En(?)

Sarah

Amy

If I am not...

then,

I'll be stuck in that house with my grandma,

my cousin who is 6,

and will irritate the crap out of me when I play the PSP.

Sigh.

I've been warned by my siblings,

by my parents,

and I really have a bad impression of this spoilt kid.

I am spoilt,

so if I call someone spoilt,

he/she really is something.

I can't stand spoilt brats,

because I am one.

My iPod,

my PSP,

my chargers.

These will sustain me,

for a while.

I guess.

I think I need to top up my phone.

I've been spending a lot on phone credit.

Bleah.

Last night's phone call to Gracia is enough to get my daddy to murder me when the bill arrives.

Bleah.

Oh well..

I haven't been spending any other ways.

I'm planing to get a pair of khakis,

so that I don't have to wear jeans to school everyday.

I hate not having uniforms.

Now I actually have to think about what to wear to class.

I wish I can just go in FBTs..

my sister warned me that only boys wear shorts,

girls usually dress up.

Yea yea yea.

Whatever.

BLEAH.

I need to reinstall my anti-virus,

expiring soon.

I cannot believe vetting my iTunes list took the whole night.

It's tiring.

and I still have songs that I don't want inside.

I'm just too tired to go sort it out already.

Plans with friends had to be canceled,

because I can't do anything when I'm out,

can't eat anything either.

All thanks to this cough,

this persistent cough.

I hate being sick.

My sister got me a new sony camera.

The one I wanted,

is this

and the one I got from my sister is

this

It's not as great,

having 3X zoom instead of 4,

8.1 megapixels rather than 10.1,

but it's mine.

and it is better than the old 5.1 cybershot.

It's still a little bulky though.

We'll see how.

I need a slim camera.

and my camera?

Doesn't have a battery.

It is still an issue for now.

Signing off.

♣

2008/12/11 || 1:34 pm

okay.

I take back what I said.

I am sick.

Although fever is gone,

I am down with a bad cough.

coupled with asthma this time.

What did I do to deserve this?!

=((

And I finally managed to sign in here.

Internet is really bad tonight.

I am bored.

I've been sleeping a lot,

like almost the entire way to KL,

and the entire way back.

Settled the sunway thing.

I'm officially a student,

I presume,

because I've paid the fees for registering and..

whatever.

Yes.

The thing is,

there are no more single rooms,

so I have to share with someone,

but boy..

The rooms are BIG!

so are the wardrobes!

and there are 2 toilets for 6 people.

I think it's good.

My sister thinks it's a luxury.

Okayokay.

Can't sign into my hotmail though.

I'm a little irked.

Will be going to KL to stay on 4th Jan.

Guess I will try to meet up with people before they go back to Sg.

I need my inhaler.

♣

2008/12/10 || 2:48 pm

Okay,

my personality is still the same,

almost completely similar.

and I like this song

plus,

here it is!

apparently logic/maths is the lowest.

I'm SOOOOO surprised.

1. I love you not because of who you are, but because of who I am when I am with you.

我愛你不是因為你是誰，而是我在你面前可以是誰。

2. No man or woman is worth your tears, and the one who is, won't make you cry.

沒有男人或女人是值得你為他流眼淚，值得的那一位，不會要你哭。

3. Just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to, doesn't mean they don't love you with all they have.
那人不是你所想般愛你，但不代表那人不是全心全意地愛你。

4. A true friend is someone who reaches for your hand and touches your heart.
一個真正的朋友是向著你伸手，觸動你心靈的人。

5. The worst way to miss someone is to be sitting right beside them knowing you can't have them.
掛念一個人最差的方式，就是你坐在他身旁，而知道你不能擁有他。

6. Never frown, even when you are sad, because you never know who is falling in love with your smile.
就算你不快樂也不要皺眉，因為你永不知道誰會愛上你的笑容。

7. To the world you may be one person, but to one person you may be the world.
在世界裡你可能只是某人，但對某人你可能是全世界。

8. Don't waste your time on a man/woman, who isn't willing to waste their time on you.
不要花時間在一個不會花時間在你身上的人。

9. Maybe God wants us to meet a few wrong people before meeting the right one, so that when we finally meet the person, we will know how to be grateful.
可能神要我們在遇到那位對的人之前先遇上一些錯的人，讓我們遇到那位對先生/對小姐時懂得珍惜。

10. Don't cry because it is over, smile because it happened.
不要因為完結而哭，要為曾經發生而微笑。

11. There's always going to be people that hurt you so what you have to do is keep on trusting and just be more careful about who you trust next time around.
這個世界永遠也會有一些傷害你的人，你要做的就是繼續去信人和小心你下次信的人。

12. Make yourself a better person and know who you are before you try and know someone else and expect them to know you.
在你嘗試了解其他人和盼望其他人明白你之前，先把你自己變成一個更好的人和了解你自己。

13. Don't try so hard, the best things come when you least expect them to.
不要太努力去找，最好的東西是在你最預計不到的時候出現。

REMEMBER: WHATEVER HAPPENS, HAPPENS FOR A REASON.
緊記: 所有事也是因果循環的。

♣

|| 7:52 am

Okay, I still have

Gina,

NyonNyon,

Chien Wen,

Dharlynnie,

~~Yindy,~~

~~Tiwi,~~

Aylwin,

Tim,

HuiZyi,

~~Vann,~~

Gracia,

Zack,

~~Vidya,~~

~~Jix,~~

~~Angeline,~~

~~Awi,~~

to go.

Dang.

That's a lot of people.

Okay,

shall start with Awi!

Awiwi!

hehehe.

I know they like to call you that,

and it really is cute.

hehe.

I like our picture in ASEAN dance,

you look really nice here.

Awi,

thanks for all the time in school.

We never really hang out in the hostel,

cuz well..

you are a guy,

plus,

you are always so busy.

Sometimes I see you at 3rd floor,

with Teki.

Yes yes.

Oh yes.

When I was the vice class chair

(at one short point of time),

hehe.

Sorry when I am not in school to help,

but you always take everything and finish it up before I can even say

"can I help?"

and all the..

"chao a qua"

"chao huan na"

It's really very funny to me..

That's mainly the hokkien that the both of us say,

to each other.

Scolding and laughing.

It really is funny.

Have I mentioned?

I like your watch.

Looks nice on you.

I have a picture with it too!

Awi,

all the best in the future,

Your maths really very good.

So thanks for helping me out so much.

I'm still trying to figure out that last few chapters.

Jix,

I know Angeline likes to call you Uncle Jix,

which comes off so different,

compared to "jixie" from Gracia.

I know it's pathetic,

but I don't have a picture of you,

except this one,

and you are with Vann.

Matt's birthday,

remember?

The rest are pictures of the whole group of us.

One has been defaced by Bo,

and the rest are with Le,

Gracia.

I haven't got them yet.

But you look cute in this picture,

don't worry,

with your signature "coke".

You should really go do adverts of something.

Maybe you can go win the "most loyal customer" award. =D

Anyway,

it was great hanging out and all.

Ice cream at Udders was funny.

remember how you thought you were losing for sure?

Well,

you didn't!

I know the last few months were pretty bad,

and you emo-ed A LOT,

like really A LOT,

but now that things are clearer,

I hope that you will know what to do next.

Do keep in touch with the rest of us.

We're all in...

pretty bad shit,

but we'll pull through this together,

somehow.

There's always facebook you know.

and hey Jix,

if you don't believe in yourself,

who will?

So don't give up,

alright?

Angeline darling!

hahaha.

These are the two pictures I remember clearly.

One is when you looked super cute,

so I took the picture and kept it.

and here's the one you insisted on joining us councillors!

*don't worry, always welcomed!*

and ASEAN dance 2008,

I miss you.

Did you know that?

I know we fight a lot in the room.

You can't take the light,

I need the light,

you draw in the room and leave all the erasers bits,

I want to listen to music and you want to study,

you want to sing and I want to study.

you don't study and then I come after you,

I don't study and you nag at me forever,

the pisang goreng thing that you let me eat,

There are a lot of memories in 4-22.

I know we were better friends in 2007,

when we didn't know each other so well,

so we didn't get so upset about each other's flaws..

but knowing you better,

is actually alright.

We were just too temperamental.

We had our good times,

didn't we?

When I shared with you my excitement about you-know-who,

and you shared yours with me.

Talking nonsense at night.

After all the disagreements,

I'm still glad we're roommates.

Granted,

they should not put 4 messy people in a room,

because we simply cannot live in a pig sty,

I still had fun.

This year,

was just not my best year,

and so..

I may have been a bit too cranky.

I'm sorry for the times I yelled at you.

I'm sorry for the times I was so inconsiderate because I was too upset to think straight,

but thank you for always trying to help,

being there for me and all.

I love you,

you crazy woman,

and I guess,

distance makes the heart grow fonder.

I never hated you,

don't worry,

and don't get so suspicious la.

I'm always upset in the room,

because I feel that the room is my only getaway from everything,

that even in the hostel

(supposedly our "home")

I still have to put on a front,

put up a mask..

and I talk to Gracia a lot,

because we are in the same school,

and we go through a lot of nonsense together.

I don't talk that much to Vann also,

just the occasional long talks,

but I still think we are decently close.

Don't worry,

and I'll not forget you.

Who can?

Dodo bird.

You are an extinct, rare species on earth.

Dearest Yindy,

I don't have pictures with you!!!!

=((

How is this possible?

I know you have one of me, Xiuling and you,

on.. 14th November I think..

Can I please have it?

I think I look bad in it since my eyes were so itchy,

but it's important to have a picture with you!

Okay,

I have one with Angeline that you are in,

on top.

Yindy,

as I told you,

because Mei calls you mummy,

I've always had this thing,

that you were my "adopted" mummy too.

hehe.

You took good care of me even when I was in Sec3.

Technically,

you didn't have to,

because I was not Indonesian,

and neither was I in Anderson,

but taking care of me,

you did.

I was so scared of you last time,

when I first joined council.

You always came across as the "no nonsense" type,

and I am..

full of nonsense,

so I was pretty freaked out,

and really afraid to disappoint you,

or make an embarrassing mistake,

but Xiu Ling was so close to you,

and being close to her,

I slowly got to know you pretty well.

I still have your little notes,

the one to encourage me for O's,

you said you hoped I will be your junior in 2008.

The one this year,

when you heard about the results,

I ate the toblerone one night after saving it,

when I was so upset..

Lol..

The one before I left,

the book you shared with Tiwi.

They are all really sweet.

Thank you.

and for the times you and XiuLing helped me out in A Maths,

hehehe..

I know I'm really slow at it,

so thank you for your patience.

Not to mention the times you offered advice for council,

the times you offered advice about BGR

( I remember I was so stressed out then)

the times you told me to just calm down and pray,

I don't know.

I just felt..

it was right.

It was alright,

because you were there.

With seniors like you,

Cheng Feng,

Xiu Ling,

Tiwi,

I think I was really lucky.

Thank you Yindy,

just one last thing,

okay?

Must keep in touch and still be friends!

I don't know what I'll do if we lose contact...

Tiwi!

hehehe.

Tiwi very cute!

This is a really bad picture,

and I look like..

your boyfriend or something.

Haha.

but it was Hsi Wen's birthday.

This is a picture I like a lot!

Thanksgiving.

And I have a lot to thank you for.

Remember the time I was talking to you and Yindy?

Common room.

Yindy was ..

upset.

Hahaha.

Disappointed maybe,

that I didn't tell her about the whole..

bgr thing.

and you were offering advices along with her.

I know I was ..

pretty funny.

*I would laugh at the me at that time*

getting mad,

being dramatic,

hehe.

It's just being me.

I know we've been friends since 2006,

but we didn't talk much in 2006,

but you always smile a lot.

In 2007,

you were the cluster captain.

hehe.

Ms Eelin sayang you a lot,

did you know that?

We like to say she's so bias,

she loves you and Indora a lot.

It's not that she doesn't take care of the rest of us,

but it's very obvious who she dotes on.

but you and Indora and super "guai"

hehe.

You always put in a lot of effort,

putting up nice notes for the bunch of us Olevels kids.

Thanks for the book that you and Yindy got for me.

I haven't started using it,

because it's..

so nice.

I tend to keep books and candles..

I think they are too nice to use!!!!!

>.<

but Tiwi,

your note..

you know,

I was pretty scared about CF camp.

hehe.

Mr Andrew signed me up.

I personally always believed that,

he knew he was leaving(this part is a fact)

and he wanted me to go,

so that I can gain some Christian exposure,

and..

well,

I believe that CF camp was great.

It was really good.

and I loved it.

I was scared too,

because I was close to Yindy.

Period.

KC was..

well.

he's an AHM,

and I wasn't close to him then.

There was..

Grace,

but she was somewhat of an AHM too..

Tim?

He was busy,

like Yindy,

so when I wanted to pull out from the camp,

a while after Mr A signed me up for it,

because I would rather have my parents visit

(like the past 2 years)

I heard about the penalty..

so I decided.

Shucks.

I'll just go.

Then Yindy told me you were coming,

and I was really glad.

We had quite a lot of fun,

didn't we?

and I got a lot closer to you then,

so I am really thankful that I went.

Tiwi,

thanks for being like a big sister to me all this time.

Stay in touch,

okay?

I have you on facebook now.

Vid!

hehe.

Here's a decent picture!

I think Cia has one of you dragging me along for our outing to ECP.

Did you know,

I used to..

admire this RJ guy,

who's your height!

YOU ARE REALLY TALL!!!

I like!

*the height part*

hahahahaha,

Just kidding

but don't slouch!

Anyway,

I didn't really get to know you until end of this year.

Bleah.

cuz I was never that close to the..

*ehem*

bridge club*

and Seng Keat was Gracia's classmate,

so I saw him quite a bit.

We used to be "hi" "bye" friends!

but after a while,

things were cool.

I still remember playing soccer at Sentosa.

I love soccer.

It's the only ball game,

that I am...

alright in.

I suck at basketball.

and I remember getting a shock,

when you told me you were MC for Asean Dance 2006,

because I knew..

it was Marconi,

and some malaysian indian dude,

who's always MIA-ing in meetings.

Lol.

I never really saw you at ASEAN comm meetings!

so boy,

was I shocked that it was..

YOU!

Lol..

I'm just glad we got closer,

and thanks for sending me off.

VANN!!!!

Hehe.

I love this picture.

A friend said you are really pretty by the way,

*I think I'm inflating your ego*

haha.

Vann,

thanks.

I read your post.

hehe.

I enjoy our b*tching session,

talking crap moments too.

I remember our first talk like that.

You were on my bed,

talking to P.

Then you were saying we were having an orgi.

I didn't even know what it means then!

>=(

Lol.

And you said I look sexy erm..

yeah.

something!

Tsk!

you are so evil,

okay?

Lol.

You,

woman,

need to decrease your nafsu!

and hey,

take care over there.

Pink princess,

You are a nice friend,

I know we talk crap a lot and all.

but I enjoyed the company.

Okay. 8 more notes to write.

I'm signing off.

Labels: angeline, awi, jix, tiwi, vann, vidya, yindy

♣

|| 7:07 am

I'm not THAT sick anymore!

and I was excused from all the housework yesterday.

I helped out here and there,

but my sister took out the trash

(my job usually... =P)

and my daddy washed the dishes

*GASP*

I'm still a little shocked.

Anyway,

went to the bank today,

and signed a lot of papers.

I have no idea what I was doing it for,

because although it was explained to me again and again,

I really don't get money matters,

just that I am getting a supplementary credit card!

which I am not supposed to use. =(

Apart from that,

I am going to KL tomorrow!

yay!

and on friday,

I'm going out to meet friends.

Primary school friends.

It's really been super long since I last saw them,

and I am glad I bumped into Yeet Chien the other day!

Okay.

I'm feeling rather happy today.

Hehehe.

My sister gave me a number of her old t-shirts.

Baby tees to be exact,

and they are nice!

I'm surprised I can wear them!

This is a good sign!

hehe.

but..

bad thing is I can't wear any of her old pants.

Got a big butt.

and I put on weight since I came home!!!

=((

My brother has been pinching my cheeks a lot and calling me

"PIG!"

like nobody's business.

Bleah.

he told me to..

"shed the poundS"

>.<

Kc,

you sound like you are reporting to me!

Lol.

I hope you have started playing with her.

She's really cute you know.

Doesn't run away when let out either.

Matt,

yeap.

Thank goodness for internet and PSP!

MingHui,

thank you.

How's things on your side?

Facebook me!

Mei,

Aish.

Get well soon!

I'm better already.

No fever anymore!

♣

2008/12/09 || 10:05 am

Okay,

I'm a little light-headed right now.

Not due to hyperness,

I'm sick,

and my temperature is 37.4..

That's not really high,

but it's still a little high,

yes?

No?

Okay,

I don't really know,

but my back hurts.

I've been cranky.

And I'm blaming it all on the illness,

since my period is just over (YES!!!)

and I can't exactly say PMS,

unless it's post.

hahaha.

Okay,

anyway,

I slept really badly last night.

I couldn't sleep,

so I watched tv until 1230am,

and then tried to sleep.

I kept waking up,

to blow my nose,

and to cough.

I was breathing through my mouth the entire night,

and it really made my sore throat even worse,

but my nose was completely blocked!

*grrr... I hate being sick*

My brother passed it to me,

my sister,

my mummy,

but I think I'm taking it the worse,

maybe I have a weaker immune,

or maybe I'm just too drama mama,

I don't know,

ut what I know ias,

I'm finishing the new box of tissue,

in one day.

Can't be helped.

I really need it.

and I need to take out the trash,

full of my tissue.

Lol..

I think I am getting pretty used to life without a maid.

It's a lot of privacy,

especially when the painters leave!

Oh yes,

I was blogging about how I slept badly.

Went to toilet twice,

and I woke up at 6am,

when my mummy got up to..

watch tv.

Yes.

I never knew she had such an odd habit.

She's an early riser.

I knew that much,

and yeah..

I woke up,

watched a little with her,

felt like killing myself,

and finally drifted back to sleep,

to 745am.

Wow.

Big deal,

seriously.

I DID NOT GET ENOUGH SLEEP!

and I can't rest,

because the paint still stinks.

Bleah.

I don't know how I'm going to get better,

apart from,

by the grace of God.

PLEASE!

I know I haven't fallen ill for a while,

but...

PLEASE let me get better..

I finished "God of War"

It's good.

Really.

It's better than "300"!

Yes Aylwin,

Yes Tim,

I sincerely believe so!

Oh yes,

I can't get pass one level of "Need for Speed"

It's really dumb,

because it's the only race,

that I am racing against time,

and I can't win.

I can beat the other racers,

but not the stupid stopwatch.

I'm giving it a rest today.

Bleah.

"MegaMan"

Goodness.

It's so difficult!

It is a lot easier on the computer.

Seriously.

It was.. difficult enough on the computer,

but now it is worse.

I could only get pass the first level after SEVERAL attempts,

and I haven't progressed yet.

BLEAH.

Yes,

Yes.

I am drowning myself in PSP games,

and vetting my iTunes music list.

so that I can install games and movies on my iTouch.

16GB,

is not that big after all,

but then again,

I only listen to about.... 1/16 of my songs?

Lol.

Okay,

my head is about to explode,

I think I have to lay off blogging and PSP-ing,

what in the world am I going to do?!

Okay.

enough of all this,

I'm sure I'm running a fever.

It will go away!

(if not I can't go to KL this thursday.. *wails*)

♣

|| 4:23 am

你说我小气，

我说你霸道。

♣

2008/12/08 || 10:28 am

I admire marathon runners.

Really,

I do,

more than sprinters

because I don't have stamina,

and I believe that sprinters are born fast,

while marathon runners are trained.

10 km is cool,

but a full marathon?

That's really really Cool.

so yes,

Aylwin,

I think you are really cool.

Congrats on finishing it!

Well well,

nothing much today.

Been playing "God of War"

the whole day,

from 11am,

to 6pm.

Yeap.

Only stopping for lunch,

toilet breaks,

and to feed my baby.

No,

not my REAL baby.

Storm darling!

Okay,

don't think you people are that dumb.

>.<

Hahaha.

So yes..

where was I?

Oh right.

I am losing my voice.

Falling sick.

Throat hurts,

my ears are itchy,

the roof of my mouth is all sore..

Yes.

I know it's coming,

and I am dreading it.

I am pretty sure my brother passed it to both my sister and I.

Okay,

I don't feel like blogging anymore.

I want to play my

"God of war"

It's more fun than 300.

Seriously.

Oh,

but I missed the part the character supposedly have sex with some girl..

Sigh.

Okay.

I'm just not meant to do bad stuff in games.

Oh,

and need for speed.

I think I'm a really lousy racer.

Reminds me of how horrific things were when I played Tim's ps3.

Lol..

but I'm looking forward to these games all the same.

Plus,

"Street Fighters"

"Mega man"

"Grand Theft Auto"

I don't think I'll be bored after all,

Thank goodness for portable games.

♣

2008/12/07 || 2:08 pm

Lol Matt.

I haven't seen you online in a while..

Miss talking to you!

Sigh.

Yeap Candice..

It's a little odd that we talk here,

we talk on facebook too..

if we start on msn,

it'll never end!

Hahahah

okay,

I downed like...

a quarter or a glass of red wine.

Merlot,

13.5% alcohol.

I didn't like it.

I never liked red wine,

but it's a social drink.

People always drink red wine.

WHY?!

Why can't they have..

tequila?

Or Whisky?

Those are good stuff.

Anyway,

forgot to pass something to my aunty,

and I got scolded,

naturally,

but I got irritated when my sister joined in the scoldings.

I'm really tired of being bossed around.

"Help me do this"

"help me do that"

and I can't say no!

simply because I'm the youngest,

and I believe in respect.

Well,

technically,

blogging like this is really disrespectful,

but it's the only way I keep calm in front of her.

If I don't help,

"eeyer.... why are you so annoying? hahahahha"

It's not funny.

I don't want to help.

Okay?

I don't want to keep running down to open the door also.

Okay?

I'm being cranky.

Shucks.

I don't know how people take it.

Seriously.

Be so cool and calm about things.

I have such a short fuse.

Sigh.

I need to calm down.

I'm always told.

Lol..

My spiritual number is 4.

You bring stability and order into people's lives. (ARE YOU SERIOUS!?)
You are a devoted friend, and you are able to help other get out of extremely chaotic situations.

Right now, your life is about making difficult choices and complicated decisions.
You find yourself at a crossroads, and you can't stall any longer.

While you may be going through a confusing time, you are confident that you will do the right thing.
You have the courage to do what's best, even when it's hard.

Okay,

I realised something,

all the tests I take on blogthings are plain weird.

I'm a loner.

They all say I enjoy being lonely.

I think it may just have to do with the fact that I am pissed off,

and want alone time right now.

I need to clear my Itouch.

There are too many songs.

I want to install games!

hahaha.

That's one thing that will definitely cheer me up.

BLEAH.

It's already 1am..

I've been blogging and chatting forever.

Why do I always wait?

But it's always in vain.

I hate this.